Unresolved Trauma and Complex Trauma
Trauma Therapy in Port Melbourne, Melbourne
“No matter how self-assured we are, in a fraction of a second, our lives can be utterly devastated.” — Levine, 2010
Trauma is an inescapable part of being human. The Greek word for trauma means wound. Experiences in our lives can leave us traumatised. It is not only what happened to you that can cause ongoing suffering; it is also what happened within you as a result.
Trauma may follow a single overwhelming experience, or it may be repeated and ongoing. Trauma and complex trauma can continue to affect how you feel in your body, your relationships, your work and the way you see yourself.
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When trauma stays with us
In moments of threat, we may fight, freeze or fawn. These responses help us survive, particularly when we have experienced abuse, childhood trauma and neglect, or situations where we did not feel safe to express what we felt.
Fear, shame, anger, sadness and pain can become held in the body when there was no safety or support to feel them at the time. We may disconnect or dissociate in order to survive. The memory of what happened may feel fragmented, unreal or difficult to explain, while the effects of it remain present in our body and subconscious.
This can show up as deep sadness or depression, feeling anxious much of the time, emotional overwhelm, low self-worth, anger and frustration, relationship issues, despair, or a sense that you are carrying something you cannot quite reach. You may understand a great deal about your experiences, yet still feel that they affect your everyday life.
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Trauma, work and burnout
For people working in health care or mental health, the ongoing impact of hearing and witnessing distress can also affect the nervous system and body. You may feel triggered by the trauma of others, overwhelmed by the needs around you, or find that work feels heavier than it once did.
You may feel isolated in your work, burnt out, or unsure how to continue without losing yourself. Perhaps you are wondering whether you can keep going in a role that once felt meaningful. You may continue to care for others at work, while feeling anxious, sad, angry or frustrated much of the time.
The effects can also follow you home. When there is little left for yourself, relationships with the people close to you can become difficult. You may withdraw, feel easily overwhelmed, or question whether you are good enough, even while giving so much to others.
Having spent more than 40 years working in health care as a nurse, I understand the realities of caring for others, the pressures within healthcare systems and the impact this work can have over time. I also understand the experience of continuing to give while carrying your own pain.
When trauma stays with us
"Complex trauma is repeated, ongoing, and often extreme interpersonal trauma – violence, abuse, neglect or exploitation experienced as a child, young person and adult."
— Blue Knot Foundation, Australia
Complex trauma develops when we experience repeated or ongoing trauma, particularly within important relationships where we should have felt safe, cared for and protected. It is often linked to childhood experiences, although it can also develop through ongoing trauma in adulthood.
Living with complex trauma can affect the way you see yourself, your relationships and the world around you. You may carry a deep sense of shame, struggle to believe you are worthy of care, or feel anxious, depressed, emotionally overwhelmed or disconnected from your body. These are not signs that something is wrong with you. They are often ways your mind and body learnt to survive difficult experiences.
Many people I work with have spent years trying to understand why they continue to struggle, even after counselling or other therapies. You may know why you feel the way you do, but still feel that nothing really changes.
I see these coping strategies with curiosity rather than judgement. They once helped you survive. The question is whether they are still serving you today.
A gentle way to work with what remains unresolved
My counselling and psychotherapy practice offers space to be heard, accepted and understood without labels or judgement. There is no expectation that you retell or relive traumatic experiences before you are ready. We work at a pace that feels safe for you.
Body-based Breathwork may offer another way to become aware of the feelings, memories, sensations and responses that may still be affecting you. It can support you to listen to your body with greater curiosity and compassion, and to make sense of what arises in relation to your life now—at work, at home and in your relationships. Working with your body may help you to access what is left unresolved and integrate it further into your current life.
To learn more about this approach, visit my Breathwork page.